Broken Heart (Broken Heart #1) Read online

“I’m fine…a little too much fun last night,” Dave said with a slow grin.

  “Yeah…that was loads of fun, I bet.” Michael glanced over at me. I smiled and reached out my hand to him, but he didn’t move.

  I stared at both of them, first Dave then Michael. I gave Dave the ‘it’s time for you to go look’ hoping Dave would get the hint, but he didn’t budge. I reached out to Michael and grabbed his hand as I said to Dave, “Good night, Dave.” Dave gave me a warm but stern smile, and as he

  passed Michael, he mumbled something under his breath. I watched him turn around and walk down the stairs to his apartment.

  Finally, Michael was with me. Michael entered the apartment but was hesitant at first.

  “I’ll take that,” I said as he handed me his coat. I walked over to the bathroom and hung his sopping coat over the curtain rod. I brought him a towel, and he dried his damp hair that he was desperately trying to comb back with his fingers. Michael stood there with flowers wrapped in plastic.

  “These are for you.” He handed me the flowers wrapped in plastic, dripping wet. We skimmed each other’s hands as he handed me the flowers. His gentle touch caressed my palm and my heart

  stood still for a moment. His blue-green eyes stood focused on me as he watched me unwrap the flowers.

  “Thank you.” I took off the plastic wrapping from around the flowers. “White Orchids and Red Roses, they’re my favorite. They’re beautiful. You didn’t have to, though.” I looked up at him. I

  was smitten with this handsome man and deep down inside I was shuddering with delight. I placed the flowers in the sink filling a crystal vase I collected from the cabinet underneath the sink.

  “I wanted to, they’re beautiful…like you.” I could feel him eyeing me from behind.

  I turned around and said,

  “Thank you. I can take your shoes and place them in the bathroom if you’d like?” I looked down at his shoes that formed tiny puddles on the tiled floor, and then I glanced up at him meeting his

  eyes that were penetrating mine. I gestured with my hands towards his feet so he could take off his shoes.

  “Yeah, sure, they’re pretty wet. Sorry about the puddles.” He stood in the middle of the hallway, a little embarrassed as he motioned with his eyes towards the couch, and I nodded. He took off his shoes, and I placed them on the floor of the bathroom. He made himself at home on the couch.

  “I hope you’re hungry. I know I am.” I jumped at the opportunity to serve him. My mother was always happy to serve my father. She felt she needed to…but I don’t know if she felt appreciated.

  “Actually, I am. I’m sorry about the mix up but your dear friend told me you lived across the street and that I was confused.”

  “Who told you that?” I stopped serving the food for a moment. I knew exactly whom he was talking about.

  “Dave, The older gentleman that had one too many last night,” he grunted with sarcasm.

  “No, you must be mistaken; he lives on the second floor of this building. Wait, what I’m I talking about, you know that, you were with me last night, and he just came up to tell me you were looking for me.”

  He gazed at me for moment, trying to read the expression on my face, as if, I thought he was lying. I tried to ignore the conversation so I turned around to get dinner ready. I felt his stare behind my back as I served the chicken francese. I turned around and said,

  “You’re here, that’s all that counts, let’s eat.”

  We sat and ate until our bellies were bursting out of their seams. That was a great meal if I do say so myself. I was proud that I could cook like my mother…she loved to cook.

  “Wow,” he rubbed his stomach jokingly, “that was delicious. You’re a great cook,” he said as he got up from his chair. He walked over towards the window and looked out and asked, “Where’s the restroom? Will you excuse me for a minute? I’d like to wash my hands.”

  I pointed towards the hallway. He walked over to the bathroom and shut the door. I spoke to him as he washed his hands.

  “I’m glad you liked it! It was my mom’s recipe!” I shouted in a high-pitched voice.

  “She’s a good cook!” he shouted back.

  “Yes, she was.” My heart hurt a little as I said the word was. I placed the roses and the orchids on the table in the living room, remembering my mother. Then, I sat at the kitchen table waiting for

  him to come out. He strutted out the bathroom with his shoeless feet, his black socks walking quietly across the tiled floor. He sat down at the kitchen table next to me.

  “Sorry, I didn’t know that your mother passed away,” he said apologetically as he leaned in close to me leaning his elbows against the table. I didn’t want to talk about it so I changed the subject quickly.

  “How about dessert?” I said interrupting him. “Chocolate pudding, whipped cream, and maraschino cherries?”

  He stood up, looked down at me, and grabbed both of my hands gently, sliding his fingers in between mine.

  “Jenesis,” he said as his sparkling eyes invited me into his trance. “May I kiss you?” His eyes twinkled as he tilted his head slightly moving in, his lips begging me to kiss his.

  Every part of me was racing like wild stallions. This was it. Finally, a kiss with the man that’s been on my mind since the day our eyes met. I looked up at him and nodded, and then I stood on my tippy toes to gently reach his lips. Our lips pressed together softly as he held me by my arms. The

  sparks hit the roof and my face was heated with emotion. That simple kiss pushed me over the edge and I wanted more. Michael pulled his lips away from me, his face blushed, and his blue-

  green eyes were hungry with desire. He grabbed my hand and walked me over to the living room and sat me down on the couch and said,

  “Thank you for inviting me over.”

  He gently cupped my face into his hands sliding his tongue across my lips. I didn’t know whether I should return the favor of allowing my tongue to meet his, but it was too late, I did, and Oh My

  God! He tasted so good, just as I imagined, as sweet as an apple martini! We gently massaged each other’s tongue, swirling and sucking while gazing into each other’s eyes. We were breathing

  intensely and you can hear the locking of our lips; it was as if we were trying to swallow each other’s soul. Jesus! I was a hot, wet, mess as I let his fingers trail tenderly up and down my back

  down to my bottom, then sliding his hands slowly coming back up around caressing my breasts over my blouse. I held his hands as his kiss became more intense, his lips and tongue reaching

  deeper and further, sucking and swallowing my tongue as if it were his own. I was melting beneath him, my hands searching for his belt as I slowly tried to unfasten it. I was wrapped in his warm

  embrace while he pushed his body against mine. I became more intoxicated off of his touch, my breathing was erratic, and the feeling of the heat and the moisture between my legs rose like an

  inferno. I had to stop him. I couldn’t let this go any further. I reached for his hands to stop him. What’s wrong with me? This guy was gorgeous, perfect, and delicious and… he wanted me.

  He stared at me deeply as I grabbed his hands, his face was red and heated, and his eyes lit up the room in the dim light. My hands searched for his chest, one touch and you could feel his strong

  tight chest bulging through his shirt. He lifted up his shirt above his navel and as he pulled it over his head, I could already imagine myself leaning my naked, hot body against his. He leaned my

  head towards the arm of the couch as he kept his stare hard and focused on my lips. I wanted explode. I could feel the passion between my legs drowning with anticipation and I gently pulled him down to me as I licked his lips with my tongue. He groaned into my mouth, letting his sweet

  tongue meet mine again. I wanted to suck the life out of him. He skimmed his hand over my thigh slowly and stopped in between my legs as he began to massage me. “There…right there,” I
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br />   whispered. I began to shudder as I pushed my body against him to feel the friction of his hand. He stopped, pulling away from my lips, breathing hard, and leaving me breathless. He stared at

  me, his eyes dark, looking at me as if he were desperate to find his way inside of me. He pushed up against me and I spread my legs wider so I could feel how hard he was. I wanted to feel him. It

  felt so good. I was so turned on by him I let myself go. I reached down toward his rock hard manhood and massaged him through his tight black jeans. He pushed against my hand as he kissed

  me sensually and I returned his kiss, feeling the warmth of his tongue entwined in mine. I didn’t want him to stop, I didn’t. I was gasping for air. Staring at him made me want to undress myself

  and let him have his way with me. He slowly lifted my silk blouse, letting his fingers slide up my stomach as he reached the rim of my bra. He gently placed both of his hands on my breast and

  gently stroked them with the palms of his hands, then pumped me with his hips back and forth, right there, yes…right there I moaned internally embarrassed to let him know I was about to come

  in my panties. I found myself getting ready to shatter, I quickly began to panic…I can’t…I can’t…not like this… I said to myself…Jenesis sit up…sit up. I couldn’t breathe, I held on to him

  tightly, and then I opened my eyes. I had to control myself, and I quickly sat up looking at him hot and confused and whispered softly, “Michael, I…I can’t.” He then placed his finger over my lips

  as he glared at me passionately, with that please, just let me make love to you look and then he said, “I know…it’s too soon, but how can I stop myself from making love to you now. Please,

  baby, let me inside of you,” he whispered as he sat up on the couch and gently swung me over his hips to straddle him.

  That was it. I wanted to come right there and then. Make love to me? The words I’ve wanted to hear, especially from him. The words I longed for from someone, but coming from his lips, those were the words that would drive me insane. He pressed his hips into my wide-open legs, in

  there…right there. I pushed down on him I felt him in full. He was big and solid. Oh my God! What am I going to do? He grabbed me by my face and startled me for a moment.

  “Do you really want me to stop, baby?” Michael leaned in and kissed me hard. His tongue invading my mouth as he sucked, tugged, and wrestled with mine. I began to rub myself against him hard

  as he felt me on him, he moaned, groaned, grabbed my hair, and pulled it hard. The pain of the pull woke me up from my wild stallion bucking, dry humping him as the friction of my moist, wet

  area between my legs ignited. I was suddenly hit with my mother’s haunting voice in my head. No mother…no…not now.

  “Jenesis, don’t sleep with a man on the first date, trust me, it will be your last.”

  I stopped moving. I was frozen. I couldn’t hide the guilt on my face. Michael held me by the waist the he let go and cupped my face in his hands as he looked into my eyes. He lowered his head and shut his eyes for a few seconds. He knew I couldn’t do it; he wanted to say it was okay, but he

  couldn’t. I stared at him as my heart raced. I sat breathless, speechless and unfulfilled. Then I spoke.

  “Michael, I can’t.” I gently pushed him away with my hands. “Please, I’m not ready for this. We just met…it’s too fast.” I said almost afraid to look at him.

  His blue-green eyes were glinting with frustration as he slid his hands off of my face and placed them down by his side on the couch. He turned his face away from me. He slowly lifted me off of

  him. He stood up and placed his shirt over his head. I can hear the disappointment as he took a deep breath and let out a sigh of dissatisfaction.

  “I don’t understand!” he said abruptly as he tucked his blue polo shirt into his black jeans. “You didn’t stop me when I was feeling you up? What happened?” His face turned red as he scowled at me while he was fastening his belt around his waist.

  I stood up slowly and began to fix my blouse embarrassed and dying on the inside as he scolded me so harshly. It almost sounded the same way my father called me a whore on the day of my prom.

  “I don’t have to explain anything to you. I just can’t and that’s it!” I said nervously as my body conformed to a different type of excitement. I was getting defensive the same way I did in Dr. Logan’s office.

  Michael eyed me for a moment, and as I walked away from him, he grabbed me by my arm holding it tightly…tightly enough for him to hurt me. I looked at him with pain in my eyes. I was shocked

  and couldn’t believe the audacity he had to grab me by my arm. My reaction set in, and I yanked my arm off from his grip. He was standing in front of me, and then slid his hands through his hair.

  You could tell he wanted to explode. He was frustrated, and he looked as if he wanted to release it…on me.

  “Really? What the hell is this all about? You invited me to your apartment, remember? Why are you giving me mixed signals? I thought you wanted the same thing I did,” he said sternly as he

  raised his eyebrows in displeasure and his beautiful lips quivered with anger. I stood there staring at him, speechless and concerned about the way he manhandled me. I was a little frightened, but I

  wasn’t going to allow him to do much more if that’s what he was thinking of doing. He looked away and turned around and walked towards the living room. He sat on the couch breathing hard,

  exasperated. He pulled on my arm a little too hard, I thought to myself. I stood in the hallway rubbing it as it ached and I glanced over at him. His leg was shaking up and down in his fury. I

  felt guilty because I knew he was right. I did invite him over. What else was he going to think if I let him touch me? I inhaled deeply and cautiously walked over to him and said,

  “You’re right, I did give you the wrong impression, but if I gave myself to you now, what would you have really thought about me?” I whispered as my voice trembled. “I’m not a one night stand, Michael. I’ve never been with a man before. This isn’t how I imagined it, especially not on my

  first date with a man I…I’d like you to leave now.” I stood in front of him with my head down trying my best to choke back my tears.

  Michael looked up at me then stood up and grabbed me gently and placed my head on his chest as he hugged me. I wept into his chest.

  “Fuck…don’t cry, I’m sorry for grabbing you by the arm like that. I get angry without thinking…one of my biggest flaws. I’m sorry Jenesis. I can’t believe I did that to you.” He held

  me gently by the back of my neck and kissed the top of my head. I cried into his chest with my hands against my face. “I’m just so happy to be with you…you don’t even understand how I feel,”

  he whispered apologetically. He looked at me with sincerity in his eyes. I let out a sigh of relief. The tears slid down my face. I couldn’t stop crying. I just couldn’t.

  “Baby, please forgive me. You must think I’m a creep right now. I’m not baby, I’m not. I’m sorry, please forgive me.” I moved away from his chest and wiped my tears with my hands. I looked up at him and his eyes were tearing, he glanced away, feeling embarrassed. He placed his hands in

  the front pockets of his jeans and waited for me to speak. I didn’t know what to do and I thought at that very moment if I forgave him I would be just like my mother.

  “Michael,” I said without looking at him, “please leave.” My tone was cold and I started to walk away from him and walk towards the bedroom. “No,” he whispered. My heart sank, and I stopped dead in my tracks.

  “Please, don’t make this any worse than it is.” I wanted to cry again, but I needed to be strong.

  “I’m not going to walk away from you. I’ve done this too many times in my past relationships, never giving anything a chance. I’ve walked away and never came back.”

  “Then you never cared about them and…that’s your choice. You
’re not going to hurt me, ever. And I’m sure as hell never going to let you hit me.” “I didn’t hit you. I grabbed you a little too tightly. Jenesis, please…I’m sorry.” He walked towards me, and I took a step back.

  “I knew I shouldn’t have trusted you, blinded by your good looks and your charm can leave a girl with a broken heart…or arm.” I was angry, and at that point there was nothing he could say or do to calm me down. I had to send him a message, and if he didn’t like it…he needed to leave.

  “I’m leaving.” He shook his head, grabbed his coat and shoes from the bathroom, gave me one last look, and walked out.

  CHAPTER 10

  I woke up the next morning feeling sick. My heart was broken and I really felt the pain. My God…I loved him. I didn’t know what I was going to do next. I had to get my head together before going

  to work tonight. I needed to talk to someone and I knew I had to make that phone call to Dave. I needed some fatherly advice. I walked downstairs in my pajamas to Dave’s apartment. I’d never

  been there before. I always made sure his apartment was off limits to me. It just didn’t feel right; but, I needed some fatherly advice, so this time, I broke the rules. I knocked lightly on the door.

  “Who is it?” I heard him ask.

  “It’s me, Jenesis” He opened the door slowly.

  “Jen, what’s wrong? Did something happen?”

  “No…well, yes…I mean, can I come in?”

  “Yeah, of course, come on in.” I walked in and was surprised to see what a beautiful apartment Dave had. It was immaculate and as I scanned the room, he had a batch of fresh white orchids

  sitting meticulously on the glass dining room table. The White leather sofas, the Oriental rug, the paintings on the walls, it was such a beautiful place for a man who lived alone. Of course, he was

  playing his favorite 80’s music on the stereo and I smiled inside, it brought back so many memories of my mother and me listening to the music in the car on our way to the precinct to pick up my

  father. I was impressed, I mean, compared to his office, I would have never thought he lived like this.